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Introduction:
In 1874, Richard L. Dugdale was chosen to inspect thirteen county
jails in the state of New York. When he got to one county, he was
surprised to find 6 relatives all held in the same jail. They were
being held on various charges including burglary, attempted rape
and assault with intent to kill. Dugdale was intrigued and decided
to study this family further. He used the fictitious name
“Juke” and wrote a book entitled The
Jukes: A Study in Crime, Pauperism, Disease and Heredity. He
traced their line back to man he called “Max” born sometime
between 1720 and 1740. The man had six daughters and two sons,
some of whom were born out of wedlock. He had been a heavy drinker
and sluggard. Out of the 709 members of this man’s family over
the intervening 150 years or so 180 were paupers, 140 were
criminals, 60 were recidivists or habitual thieves and 50 were
prostitutes. No doubt, these kinds of bad deeds are not genetic.
But consider the family legacy started by one man who seemed to be
zealous for bad deeds and the curse it seemed to place on his
family for years to come. Certainly a Juke could rise above the
family, but it wasn’t easy. However, consider the family of
another man born just a few years before “Max Juke.” Jonathan
Edwards was born in 1703. He became a theologian, pastor and even
president of Princeton University. At least one of his sermons is
still studied in modern literature classes. You may remember
studying the sermon “Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God” and
the religious awakening it sparked in the early days of the
colonies. In 1900, A.E. Winship studied 1400 of Edwards
descendents. 100 became preachers or missionaries, 13 college
presidents, 65 professors, 100 lawyers, 30 judges, 66 physicians,
80 holders of public office (including 3 U.S. senators, 3 mayors
of large cities, 3 governors, a controller of the U.S. Treasury,
and U.S. vice president).[1]
Do you see the difference a family can make?
Let me ask you, which kind of family do you want to
be—Jukes or Edwards? What kind of family legacy do you want to
create? No matter what your family has been, a new legacy can
start with you right now. You can develop a family zealous for
good deeds and watch it change your family tree. But what will
that look like and how can you manage it? Let’s consider those
questions together. Discussion: I.
A family zealous for good deeds… A.
…is anchored in the Word. 1.
II
Timothy 3:16-17
makes it very clear that apart from the word of God, we are
unequipped for good deeds. A family zealous for good deeds, then,
must be anchored in the Word. I don’t care what good things you
are doing, if the foundation of God’s Word is not paving the way
for it, then you are not being zealous for truly good deeds. Keep
these verses in context. Cross reference II
Timothy 3:14-15 with II Timothy 1:5 and we
recognize that Paul’s statement to Timothy was anchored in his
family upbringing. Timothy had a foundation in the word because
his mother and grandmother had been devoted to the word and passed
that on to him. 2.
We need to remember Deuteronomy
6:4-9. For the Old Testament saints, everything began with
the family passing the Law onto its children. They had to be
anchored in the Word. Let me ask you, how often is the Word
discussed in your home? I’m not even talking yet about specific
Bible studies, but how often does the Word come up in your
conversations? How often is it used to answer questions? How often
is it used to help make decisions? How often is it part of your
life at home? Do you sometimes go whole days without even talking
about God or His word in your family? I know at times my family
and I have caught ourselves in that predicament. We simply cannot
be equipped, either as individuals or as a family, for good deeds
unless the Word of God is the foundation for our family and paves
the way for us. Thus, if we want to be a family zealous for good
deeds, we have to be very specific and purposeful in our study and
use of God’s Word and quit waiting on the church to pass that on
to our kids. B.
…starts at home. 1.
Before a family tries to be a force for good in the world,
they must start by being zealous for good deeds in their own home.
What good does it do us if we are wonderful, loving and generous
to every one in the world if we are mean and hateful to our
parents, children and siblings? Sadly, some of us are like this.
Consider the Old Testament examples of Eli and Samuel, men who
were zealous for good deeds when it came to others and their work
as priests but who failed miserably in raising boys who were also
zealous for good deeds. 2.
I
Timothy 5:1-2 demonstrates
that zeal for good deeds must start at home. It tells us to treat
older men in the congregation like fathers, older women like
mothers, younger men and women like brothers and sisters. Did you
catch the assumption in this passage? For this passage to mean
anything, we must do good works at home. What we do to others
outside the home should be an extension of how we have learned to
treat each other in the home. 3.
Note what Paul says about who should take care of widows in
I
Timothy 5:4, 8, 16. Children and grandchildren should
learn to perform good deeds for their parents and grandparents
before burdening anyone else with having to do good deeds for
their dependents. In fact, if we are not taking care of our own,
especially those of our own household, we are called worse than
infidels. This passage is not just about the husband having a job
and paying the bills, this is about doing good to and taking care
of our family. If we don’t, we are worse than unbelievers. Did
you get that? We can believe and teach the truth, lining out the
doctrine of Christ, dotting the I’s and crossing the T’s on
every point, but if we are not starting with good deeds at home,
unbelievers are better than us. 4.
When zealous families start at home, Dad and Mom must set
the example. Consider again Timothy’s mother and grandmother who
set the example for him according to II
Timothy 1:5. Think about John Mark who traveled with Paul.
I know he struggled on his first trip with Paul, but how many
people even made it far enough to start the trip with Paul? Yet,
even with that, he became useful to Paul. Where do you think John
Mark began this trek for good works? Did it start with the example
of his mother as seen in Acts
12:12? 5.
Dads, remember that training in the home is under your
headship according to Ephesians
5:22-23; 6:4. You must set the example and provide the
training to make your family one zealous for good deeds. Let me
tell you what this does not mean. This does not mean you go about
fulfilling your every whim and desire as you pursue your career
goals and you delegate and command your wife and kids to do good
deeds. If you want your wife to be hospitable, you had better
sacrifice for your wife as Jesus sacrificed for you (cf. Ephesians
5:25, 28-29). That means helping her get the house
cleaned, etc. Men, notice that one of the qualifications for
eldership is being hospitable (I
Timothy 3:2; Titus 1:8). This doesn’t mean elders have
hospitable wives. It means elders are hospitable. Again, Dads, you
are the example and head of good deeds in your home. For the moms,
don’t forget what Paul said about the widows who can be on the
church’s role for care in I
Timothy 5:9-10. A woman should not be on the church’s
role even if she is widowed and abandoned by her family if she was
not an example of good deeds. Notice that the first good deed
listed is raising children. 6.
Dad and Mom, as you start at home. Make sure you are
teaching your children to be good to one another. Make sure
passages like Ephesians
4:29-32 begin at home between the kids. Don’t tolerate
the kind of infighting, bickering and hatefulness that sitcoms
portray as normal among families between your children as if it is
just a phase. Train them up to begin their good deeds at home.
Train them to treat their brothers and sisters properly, that way
they have a basis for knowing how to treat others (cf. I
Timothy 5:2). C.
…take it outside the home. 1.
In the last point, we find that some families can be
wonderful to everyone except those within their own family. In
other cases, some families are close, tight-knit, do everything
together and portray a very Waltonesque picture of caring for one
another and doing good deeds at home, but rarely break out to
others. Families zealous for good deeds begin at home, but they do
not stop there. They take their good deeds outside the home to
their brethren and their neighbors. Remember, the story of the
Good Samaritan that we learned about in our last lesson was not
based on the command to love our families, but to love our
neighbors (cf. Luke
10:27ff). 2.
According to Proverbs
17:17, a brother is born for adversity. However, we also
need to learn to be friends that are better than brothers
according to Proverbs
18:24. Further, we have noticed the assumption from I
Timothy 5:1-2 about how good deeds begin at home. But we
must not so focus on the assumption that we miss the point. The
point of the passage is based on doing good deeds at home but is a
command to do the good deeds you learn in the home to others
around you. Families zealous for good deeds treat older men and
women as they have learned to treat their father and mother. They
treat younger men and women as they have learned to treat their
brothers and sisters. 3.
Don’t forget Romans
12:10. It says we should love each other with brotherly
affection. In other words, that love we have learned to have for
those within our families should be extended to those outside it.
Notice in context some examples of good deeds in the surrounding
passage (Romans
12:9-18). Families zealous for good deeds abhor what is
evil and hold fast to what is good. We do not rejoice when someone
is doing wrong or living in sin as if that is a good deed. They
rejoice through all things because of the hope we have from God.
They are patient in the bad things and they are constant in prayer
for their family and others. They contribute to the needs of
saints. They show hospitality. They support others emotionally,
rejoicing with those who rejoice and weeping with those who weep.
They strive for harmony with others by never thinking more of
themselves than they ought. They do good even to those who harm
them. This is just a sampling of the good works we should do and
to which our families should be devoted as we are zealous and
fervent in spirit. II.
Three keys to managing good deeds A.
Sadly, one of the reasons many families are not zealous for
good deeds is we don’t manage our lives to be zealous for good
deeds. The fact is we don’t have to be families zealous for bad
deeds to leave a terrible generational legacy like the “Jukes”
family. All we have to do is only ever intend to be zealous for
good deeds but not ever really get around to it. I know for my
family and me, we often get caught up in the rat race and let life
happen to us. We spend our time just trying to catch up with what
happens to us, trying to make it through the next day. We always
intend to be zealous for good deeds but often don’t actually
measure up. There are three keys to help us overcome this and
actually get busy being zealous for good deeds. B.
Managing
Time: Ephesians
5:15-16 directs us to make the most of our time. We must
redeem it. We must use it to its fullest. That only happens when
we strive to manage our time. If we don’t plan time for good
deeds we will spend all our time running from work to PTA to
scouts to sports to church and never really get zealous for good
deeds. It is amazing how much recreation we can schedule in. We
never want for little league, football, volleyball and other fun
and games and then when good deeds for others need to be done, we
hold up our hands and say we just don’t have the time. If we are
going to be a family zealous for good deeds, we had better manage
our time for good deeds. Meals don’t get cooked, the sick
don’t get visited, the mourning don’t get encouraged, the lost
don’t get taught, the poor don’t get helped unless we plan
time to get those things done. Are you just letting life happen to
you and then trying to race to catch up or are you managing your
time so you can get the good deeds done? C.
Managing
Finances:
While it is good for us to enjoy the material blessings God has
given us, we need to recognize God has not blessed us merely so we
can have all the gadgets and gizmos we want. He hasn’t blessed
us materially merely so we can have a great retirement. According
to I
Timothy 6:17-19, if we are going to use our material
blessings properly, we must be generous with others in good works.
Look at your budget. Is there a good works category? When
announcements are made about the needs of others have you made
financial plans to be ready to help with that? Or are you like
most Americans, up to your eyeballs in debt because you have been
spending next year’s money on last year’s personal pleasures?
By the way, I’m saying this to remind me to get my family and
myself in gear. We won’t accidentally be rich in good deeds. We
have to plan for it financially or it won’t happen. D.
Find
Your Niche:
This third one seems a bit different. However, if you want your
family to be zealous for good deeds, you need to help each family
member find his/her niche for good deeds. Consider Tabitha of Acts
9:36, 39. She didn’t do every possible good deed out
there. But she did what she could do for whom she could. The fact
is, there are so many possible good deeds out there, no one person
or even one family can do them all. Don’t wear yourself out
trying to do them all. Do the ones that fit you. Don’t get me
wrong, we all need to stretch ourselves and get out of our comfort
zones as we are being zealous for good deeds. But, zeal comes much
more naturally when we are talking about actions we are good at
and enjoy. The fact is I will never be zealous for the good deeds
of helping with housing or car repairs. I’m not any good at
those things. My brother, Chris, on the other hand is great at car
repair and can use that as a basis for his good deeds. In your
family, help each member find his or her niche. Someone may be
great at taking care of kids. Let them baby-sit for a young family
to let the mom and dad have some needed alone time. Someone may be
able to do yard work. Let them help out a widow or widower.
Someone may be a great reader. Have them sit with a shut-in and
read to him/her. Someone may be a great cook. Let them get meals
together for those who are struggling. Someone may be a great
encourager. Keep them stocked with cards, stationary and give them
time to visit others in need of encouragement. Whatever you do,
let your spouse and kids find their niche and not simply do what
you do. Conclusion: Do you remember the “Jukes” and the Edwards that we talked about at the beginning of this lesson? That is a startling contrast. Notice however that each story began with one person who were themselves part of some family or other before them. Each father chose what he would be like and what his immediate family would be like. It impacted their descendents for years. What kind of generational legacy would you like to leave? How much better to start being zealous for good deeds right now and train your family to do the same. Will everyone who ever comes from your descendents follow suit? Of course not, but there is no doubt you can impact your family for years to come. You can impact God’s kingdom for years to come if you work on these keys and help your family be zealous for good deeds. [1] Maxwell, John, Today Matters, Warner Faith, Nashville, 2004, pp 105-107 (the number about preachers came from http://www.ravenhill.org/edwards.htm accessed on October 18, 2008).
Glory
to God in the church by Christ Jesus
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